Slow Travel Is Wonderful, Yet We Still Had Challenges


I’ve had a bunch of reader requests for our lessons learned from slow travel.

I’ll mention parts of our trips during this post, and the “Related articles” section at the bottom will have more information about our destinations. All of our Facebook photos in those links are public, and they have location tags & captions. This post will focus on the process, not so much the destinations or experiences.

2018 was a busy year, and we’d predicted that our life was just going to get busier in 2019.

Boy, were we right.

Image of Facebook flight path from Honolulu to Washington DC for Nordman trip in 2019 | The-Military-Guide.com

Starting our second trip of 2019.

We might have let our ambition get ahead of our abilities… in a good way.

In 2019 we left Oahu for two separate two-month trips. We logged over 17,000 miles on the first trip and over 19,000 miles on the second trip. All of it went to Western Europe through the Mainland, and we happily wandered among a dozen small towns (on both sides of the Atlantic) in six different languages. You can see more of those details in our photos.

You can read about the first trip happening mostly by Space A on Navy aircraft and the second trip covering three life-changing financial conferences on two continents.

This post discusses long-term sustainable lifestyle travel, either with a home base or as perpetual travel. We’re going to assume that you already understand passports, Global Entry, TSA Precheck, the Mobile Passport app, rewards credit cards, smartphone maps, and Google Translate’s camera + microphone.

Now let’s get to those lessons we learned. Again. And this time we really mean it!

Travel with kids and without kids

Image of Nordman family with in-laws at Mauna Loa Macadamia tour on Hawaii Island. | The-Military-Guide.com

Family and in-laws on the Big Island, 2003.

This was our most frequent reader question. It’s also our most important lesson learned.

Some families travel very well with kids, and other families prefer staycations. We did all right with our family trips in the 1990s and 2000s, mostly to neighbor islands, Disney, and Mainland relatives. We did much better as our daughter got older and started touring universities.

During Carol’s college years we traveled around her schedule. We were usually home when she was on break, and we visited her Mainland campus once or twice a year when our other travel passed nearby. We made one family trip to Bangkok over her 2013 winter break, which turned into a fun Navy ROTC tutorial on liberty ports.

Yet even as your teens launch from the nest, you’re still a parent. You’re still being responsible (darn it) and you’re still trying to model good behavior. You’re also struggling to react to your former kid as a young adult, especially when they’re old enough to legally outdrink you.

Meanwhile, your progeny might need the family vacation period for personal recovery time. Maybe they just want to sleep in through lunch and see what’s different in their ol’ familiar neighborhood. They’ll gain a new homecoming perspective as they reflect on how they’ve changed as they leave the nest. The good news is that sometimes it’s simply easier to stay home.

After Carol graduated and started her military career, Marge and I have had much more fun visiting our young adult at her homeports as part of enjoying our own empty-nester slow travel. We’ve visited Carol (and later K.J.) at least once at every duty station. We greatly appreciated the free lodging (thanks again, guys!) while we enjoyed the chance to share their travails and triumphs in person. Carol was stationed in a couple of our 1980s ports, and we really had fun revisiting the old places and meeting shipmates. Maybe it’s because this time we had more liberty and more money… although admittedly less energy.

Image of book cover of "40 Day Trips From Rota" by Melinda and Jim Ronka | The-Military-Guide.com

Visiting Rota? Get this book.

I think we also enjoyed those homeports as personal victory tours of seeing & doing everything that we never had time for between deployments and duty sections. During two separate trips to visit Carol in Rota, we did 36 chapters of “40 Day Trips from Rota.”  (Thanks for the advice and the excellent maps, Melinda & Jim!) At every visit, we’ve also had fun helping Carol & K.J. by unpacking (a few) moving boxes of household goods and hanging (some) pictures.

Best of all, during those trips, we’ve built new relationships with Carol and K.J. as adults and travel buddies. This simply did not happen with my parents when I was in my 20s, and I’m glad that I’ve tried harder with our next generation.

In every other way, empty-nester travel is fantastic. It’s a second adulthood with more personal time and a bigger entertainment budget.

If your family has figured out how to enjoy six-week extended trips, then keep going! But if family vacations have been tough for you to organize & execute, then take heart: your empty-nester travel years let you reset the rules and enjoy yourself.

Travel with a purpose

Image of Hickam Passenger Terminal Space A flights to Washington DC, northern California, Guam, and Japan.

“Where would you like to go today?”

My spouse and I can get a free seat on a military Space-Available flight at just about any part of the month. Typical non-stop destinations are not only the Mainland but Guam and Japan. With three hours’ notice we can grab our passports, stuff a backpack, close up the house, and mark ourselves present at the Hickam Passenger Terminal.

Yet we don’t do that. Not yet anyway.

We allocate enough funds for just about anywhere in our travel budget, but we don’t even “pick up and go” to a neighbor island without making plans. We’ve never scampered down to the Aloha Tower cruise terminal for a last-minute pier-jump fare. Not yet anyway.

Maybe we had too much of that no-notice travel during our Navy days. (Admittedly back then it was a different type of “cruise.”) Perhaps we’re slowing down, or we’re just lazier.

Frugality runs deep in my bones, but our travel seems more complicated than that. Our recurring theme focuses on the value, not the money. I hesitate to mindlessly pay full retail for commercial flights, let alone first class. Instead, I have a great time on military Space A with a $6 box lunch, or we flex our frugal skills by travel-hacking a commercial flight. At this point in our lives, we should relax and stop fretting about the expense of an occasional first-class commercial airline ticket. Yeah, it’s a #FirstWorldProblem, and we worked hard to earn it.

We’re also optimizers. We like to plan the big picture and then be open to the opportunities within that plan. Oahu is over 2500 miles from the closest continent, and we don’t want to make that flight more often than necessary. We’d rather spend two months exploring a destination’s neighborhoods and living like locals instead of racking up the airline miles in a two-week whirlwind.

We’re certainly fulfilled by visiting family, but we also enjoy attending financial conferences and smaller financial-independence meetups. We like bookending our plans with a couple of those events and then filling in the details between them.

Travel with stamina

We’re in our late 50s, but our travel stamina is not only related to our age.

Marge and I like each other a lot and we have very complementary travel styles. We’re both introverts, and we need daily quiet time to recharge. We prefer exploring on our own instead of guided tours, and we’ve learned to leave at least half of the day unstructured. Our idea of a great routine is a leisurely breakfast, a 10 AM departure to a local destination with a few hours of wandering through it, and a late lunch. We’re generally back in our AirBnB for a break before dinner. Sometimes we’re out in the evenings for dinner and an event, while other times we’re lazy at our lodgings.

We are absolutely not out the door at sunrise, racing in a rental car to six destinations for selfies while eating 2-3 meals on the road and then returning home after sunset. We know how to do that, but we deliberately avoid it.

We’ve also learned a few skills with managing our energy levels– and our sanity.

Image of Doug Nordman relaxing with a cup of cafe Americano on lanai of the museum at the Roman ruins of Conimbriga Portugal. | The-Military-Guide.com

“How did we miss that bus?!?”

The first one is “the down day” every 3-4 days. Instead of exploring the town we take care of laundry and e-mail, catch up on social media or writing, and talk about our weekly plans. We’ll shop for groceries or visit a nearby pub for a meal. We might hang out in the local park for a short walk or the farmer’s market. If we’re in a popular weekend destination (like Amsterdam) then we almost always end up doing a down day on Saturday or Sunday while the rest of the crowds race around us.

Our other skill is taking a break during the day for an ice-cream cone or a cup of coffee. What we’re actually doing is sitting down in a quiet corner where we can really figure out how we missed that connecting bus, or which train we need to catch next, or the best walking route to the museum. This usually happens when we’re trying to navigate a crowded sidewalk or figure out directions in a hurry while reading a tour book. We’ve learned to take a break whenever we’re a little rushed, a little frazzled, and a little too locked-in at pushing to a target.

Our military careers taught us how to get stuff done, but we no longer need to crush through obstacles to reach our travel goals. Nobody’s keeping score. It’s far better to take a 20-minute pause instead of racing to make up the 10 minutes you just lost from that wrong turn.

There’s no need to take on mission risk, which brings me to our next lesson.

Travel healthy

Image of horse-drawn carriages parked on the street in Sevilla Spain. | The-Military-Guide.com

Horses on the right, tram tracks on the left.

Our #1 travel rule is “Don’t get hurt.”

It’s not pickpockets or muggings and it’s certainly not ziplines or rugged hiking trails. I’m far more concerned about sneaky trams, loose cobblestones, horse-drawn carriages, aggressive cyclists, and suicidal scooters. When you’re walking while distracted by your map or the scenery, you’re even closer to disaster. It’s one more reason to slow down and not pack too many activities into the day.

In Amsterdam, we quickly learned to fear the cute little “Ding-ding!” bells of cyclists, and we will not jaywalk in Bangkok.  We don’t walk on the bicycle trails in Spain, and we try not to walk on wet cobblestones anywhere.

Image of bicycle parking in Amsterdam, including compartment with seating for kid passengers. | The-Military-Guide.com

“Ding!-Ding!-Ding!” *THUD*

We’ve both had bad colds during travel, and we know we have to take it easy for a few days (even extend our stay) while we recover. We both got nailed with a nasty virus at Ramstein Air Base in Germany, and Marge might even have had the flu. (She still doesn’t remember much of her Space A Patriot Express flight from the Ramstein Inn to a Baltimore hotel. She finally perked up on the fifth day after the flight.) This happened despite our 40-year records of annual flu shots.

Our defense is imperfect, but we have good casualty procedures. I pack a four-day supply of decongestants and antihistamines to tide us over to a drugstore. We pack large bottles of ibuprofen and acetaminophen. We pack a small bottle of Pepto-Bismol (unopened so far!) and we’ve visited pharmacies from Bangkok to Barcelona. We stay hydrated and we try to minimize the self-imposed stress & fatigue.

We also practice medical tourism. I’ve had two very thorough physical exams at Bumrungrad Hospital, and I have at least as much faith in their skilled care as I do in our local Queens or Tripler hospitals. We’re also treated a lot better in Bumrungrad than any American hospital I’ve ever visited.

We no longer carry dental insurance, so we routinely get dental exams and cleanings in our destinations. We’ve paid $45 in Coimbra for the same dental care that’s 3-4 times the price on Oahu. We’ve paid a lot less for that in Thailand– and with discounts on full-body massages from the place next door.

We walk as much as we can during our daily travel routine. After two months of 2-6 miles per day during our last trip, I’m back to handling at least three miles with minimal knee pain. On Oahu, I do more surfing (and less walking), but now I’m going to maintain the walking and knee-stability work. And this time I really mean it.

Travel light(er)

We struggle with packing lighter, and we still take a checked bag.

We’re routinely under 35 pounds, but it’s the volume. Some of this is aloha omiyage for friends or thanking a host. Some of it is a few copies of my books (preferably the smaller pocket guides) and business cards for financial conferences.

A lot of it is packing for three climates: hot, rainy, and freezing Space A military aircraft.

We’re not hardcore minimalists, but we’re certainly living lighter. When you travel for two months with less than 35 pounds then you start to apply those principles at home too.

On our last trip we learned several packing tips from Kristy & Bryce of Millennial Revolution. When we take shorter trips then I’m going to consolidate from a roller bag (and a 25-liter day pack) to “just” a 40-liter backpack.

What about our home, our rental property, and our mail?

Our “worst” home problems have been our rental property’s tenants and the U.S. mail.

Neighbors & friends have our lockbox code and can get into the house for emergencies– or they can simply text or e-mail.

Burglars would be frustrated. We don’t own valuables and we don’t keep cash in the house.

We rig the place for hurricanes if we’ll be gone during the season.

Image of the water shutoff valve for a refrigerator. | The-Military-Guide.com

No water leaks in this refrigerator icemaker.

I’m a submarine vet, and we’ve upgraded our home’s infrastructure. Our photovoltaic system generates solar power while we’re away (and gives us extra credits with our electric company). We leave the refrigerator running, and melted ice cubes would tell us if there was a long power outage. We’ve replaced old water valves on every faucet & toilet with new reliable ball valves. We leave the solar water heater system running instead of isolating it, and a leak there would simply flow out of our garage or off the roof.

The most important part of abandoning your home is recognizing that it’s only a house. It’s an awesome home, but if something happened to it then we’d fix it and resume our lives. If a hurricane or a fire destroyed it then we’d file the insurance claim and rebuild.

Our rental property was more of a hassle during travel. Last year our tenants gave their 30-day notice on the night before we left for two months of travel. It’s the first time that’s happened to us!

A friend recommended a property manager who took care of turning over the tenants. The tenants had a lot of trouble moving out, and they held over for nearly two more weeks (at pro-rated rent). We returned home just two weeks after they left, so it was a good thing that we didn’t shorten our trip. They left the rental in decent condition and our son-in-law (thanks, K.J.!) helped us return their security deposit on time.

A full-time property manager didn’t work out (for various reasons) and we’re still self-managing. If this happens again, though, we’ll hire another property manager (or ask a favor of a friend) to handle the turnover.

Image of speeding ticket in Washington DC mailed by contractor for a rental-car agency. | The-Military-Guide.com

This must’ve been too hard to e-mail? Right.

The U.S. Postal Service does a great job of holding our mail, and we could see most of the envelopes through their Informed Delivery service.  However, we could have used a mail-opening service for the government agencies (we’re lookin’ at you, IRS and the state of Hawaii) who insist on mailing letters instead of using e-mail. Nothing bad happened but officials had to wait a month for our response.

Last September as we left FinCon and Washington DC, a traffic camera caught me driving our rental car at 47 MPH in a 35-MPH zone on NY Avenue. Hertz did not notify us of the fine, although they sent us plenty of other unsolicited e-mails. Instead, they turned the ticket over to a contractor who… three weeks later snail-mailed a letter to our Hawaii address. 50 days after my crime I picked up our mail and almost threw that spammy-looking envelope in the junk-mail trash. I paid the $100 fine only a few days before it was due to double.

I wonder how much traffic-camera revenue the District earns from us clueless visitors.

USPS technically only holds mail for 30 days but our local post office has tolerated up to 60 days. (We get very little mail.) We could use a mail-scanning service, a P.O. box, or another favor from a neighbor, but we still haven’t found a short-term mail service that’s worth the setup hassle. It’s also convenient for us to mail packages home from travel, where our local post office will hold them until we return.

Travel on a budget

Sorry, we spend generously on this part of our lives. We do a little travel hacking with loyalty programs and credit-card rewards but we prefer to rent more expensive centrally-located AirBnB apartments.

However, we can point you to a couple of studies.

My friend Tom Wahl (remember “The Wandering Wahls?”) found a fascinating financial report from the Center for Retirement Research at Boston College. The Employee Benefit Research Institute reports survey data that travelers in their mid-60s spend over 20% less than those in their 50s. The biggest drops in expenses were in food (after the kids leave the nest) and entertainment.

Other EBRI reports suggest that empty nesters spend less with age, and the “retirement spending smile” has also been observed by many financial advisors.

Travel while you still can, knowing that this portion of your spending will decline. Cut expenses on the parts which aren’t important to you (especially off-season) and live like a local instead of staying in resorts.

Our cheapest travel comes from military Space A flights and the occasional AirBnB discount for longer stays. We are not foodies and we rarely eat more than one meal a day at a restaurant. (We prefer cafes and street food.) We follow the typical guidebook advice on discounted admission and we use a travel rewards credit card as much as possible.

“Could we live here for a while?”

Financial independence gives you the opportunity to find out how much you want to travel– and where. You may have already found your mythical “forever home”, but you’d be surprised what you can discover in the rest of the world.

If I had to pick a new place right now, we’d live in southern Portugal or Andalucia on a retiree visa. Chiang Mai is certainly near the top of the list, and we should explore Chiang Rai someday. Italy’s hill towns and Padua are good, too, although we’d find one of the less-touristy locations.

Before I make a long-term commitment to any of those places, though, we need to do more research in Australia and New Zealand. Japan’s on the list too.

Wherever we ended up, we’d use those rentals as a base to explore the rest of Europe and Asia.

Image of Doug Nordman's granddaughter with a copy of the book "The Military Guide To Financial Independence and Retirement" | The-Military-Guide.com

She’s saving her money for travel, too.

That’s our long-term contingency plan, but for the next few years, we’re going to focus on our granddaughter. We have no idea where the Navy will send her family, but I’m pretty sure we’ll enjoy visiting her. (And her parents, too, of course!) Then we’d spend a few more months in their surrounding area and maybe attend a financial conference or two along the way.

Could we do this for the long term?

Heck yeah. Try to stay healthy and plan to travel while you still can.

Paul & Vicki Terhorst have been expatriate perpetual travelers for over 35 years. Billy & Akaisha Kaderli have lived the same lifestyle for nearly 30 years. Kristy & Bryce of Millennial Revolution have been homeless for over four years. Alan & Katie Donegan of PopUp Business School (and FI Chautauqua) recently ditched their home for extended travel.

I get regular updates from Heather Hope and Volkan Akkurt on their years of house-sitting around the world, and Tim & Amy Rutherford document their experiences on YouTube.

My personal idols are an elderly couple we met in a Space A passenger terminal. He was dragging a small roller bag in one hand and using a cane with the other. She had a backpack and a small bag. Both were slim & trim and looked like they could walk all day. They had signed up for “any part of Europe”. (Our flight happened to be going to Rota.) They preferred Germany but they were quite happy to wander through Spain, France, and Italy along the way. They planned to spend at least a week at each stop, but they hadn’t made reservations yet. They were going to leave before their 90-day Schengen limit to spend another month visiting their three families of grandkids on their way home. On earlier trips, they’d applied for longer visas and spent most of a year wandering the continent.

As we talked about Europe, he mentioned that he was 85 years old. He’d recovered from a broken hip and expected the trip to be good physical therapy. He’d flown military Space A longer than I’d been alive.

After hearing their stories, I gained a new life goal.

It’s your turn in the comments. Are there any other questions about slow travel? What lessons have you learned on your trips?

[earnist ref=”the-military-guide-to-financial-independence” id=”70177″]

Related articles:
Should You Attend FinCon, Military Influencer Conference, Camp Mustache, CampFI, and FI Chautauqua?
Military Space Available Travel: Tips for Flying Space-A The Navy Way
Good News! How Our Nords Family Financial Independence Life Will Change In 2019
Surprising Secrets Of Slow Travel
Fast Personal Growth Through Slow Travel
Travel While You Can
Our Retirement – The Spending Smile Of Financial Independence
Lifestyles In Retirement: 90 Days In Spain
Lifestyles In Financial Independence: Your Mortality
Here are public photos from the trips. All of them have dates, location tags, & commentary. Please drop a comment or contact me if you have questions about a specific location or activity!
Facebook photos & captions from Europe 2019 part 1
Facebook photos & captions from Europe 2019 part 2

Posted in Military Life & Family, Travel | 8 Comments

The “What’s Up Next?” Podcast: “Looking Out For Mom And Dad”


 

A few months ago I joined Doc G and Paul Thompson of the What’s Up Next? podcast for a panel discussion about a family financial problem:

How do you look out for your parents when you don’t know anything about their finances or their wishes?

Image of financial journalist Cameron Huddleston's book "Mom and Dad, We Need to Talk" how to have essential conversations with your parents about their finances | The-Military-Guide.com

Click the image to learn more.

Our panel included Cameron Huddleston, whose book “Mom And Dad, We Need to Talk” has been out since June 2019.  She’s taken care of her mother for over a decade of Alzheimer’s Disease. A few years before when Cameron was drafting the manuscript, she interviewed me for over 90 minutes about managing my father’s finances.

We were joined by Stephen Chen of New Retirement who discussed how he started his retirement calculator company after helping his mother figure out her retirement finances. He’s had lots of feedback from his thousands of clients, some of whom are dealing with aging parents who are reluctant to discuss their wealth and their estate plans.

We heard from Jen Smith of Modern Frugality with stories of her mother’s financial difficulties, which her Mom didn’t share until it was too late.  You can listen to that audio snippet here:

 

The six of us talk about our family experiences of sharing our financial situations and our plans with our parents. Everyone worries that Mom & Dad might want (or need) our help, while we’re simultaneously concerned that our parents will think we’re invading their privacy or even trying to take away their control.

We also spend most of the podcast talking about ways to start those awkward conversations. Cameron’s book is filled with scripts for opening the subject and sharing your own financial concerns before bringing up your questions about your parents’ finances.

You can listen to the podcast episode at this link.

It’s a difficult conversation. You won’t want to talk about it with your family, and you’ll keep putting it off. When you finally do bring it up, your parents won’t want to talk about it either. They might not only put it off but could even shut down and be offended at your apparent intentions.

But if you think that parental conversation is hard, let me share the consequences of not having those talks.

 

Getting “the call”

Nine years ago this month, I got the 4 AM phone call from my father’s hospital. Dad, a widower since the 1980s, was recovering in the ICU from repairs to a perforated ulcer. The surgeon said Dad had shown up in the Emergency Room shortly after midnight, incoherent with pain. Dad lost consciousness as the ER team frantically tried to check for a heart attack and to do a CAT scan for other clues. By the time they discovered the hole in his duodenum, the situation had deteriorated to thoracic “slash and mop” only minutes before it was too late. The trauma doc was exhausted after spending the night saving Dad’s life, and he had a lot of questions about Dad’s dementia symptoms. How had his situation become so dire?

Image of Dean Nordman, Doug Nordman's father, at Colorado Monument National Park in December 2009 | The-Military-Guide.com

Dad at Colorado Monument National Park

Months later, I figured out from Dad’s medical records that he had first felt his “slipping memory” in mid-2008. In late 2009 he told us he could no longer use his computer, and we realized that he was dealing with dementia. He refused all offers of help (I explain why in the podcast) and he lived independently in his two-bedroom apartment until February 2011. He recovered from the surgery (and malnutrition from poor self-care) and spent over six years in care facilities before passing away in late 2017.

 

Figuring out the money

While Dad regained his health in the care facility, my brother and I spend over $10K of his money on legal fees to be appointed his guardian and financial conservator. I also covered another $25K of Dad’s bills at the care facility while we argued with his insurance company about the claim on his long-term care policy.

During the 10-month legal process, Dad’s pension and Social Security deposits piled up at his local bank and his investments continued in autopilot. It was only two years after the bottom of the Great Recession, and Dad had let his asset allocation drift to 85% equities and 15% bonds. This is not considered the optimal asset mix for a potential decade of long-term care expenses, but I couldn’t legally do anything about it.

Image of Dean Nordman and Doug Nordman (Dean's son) sitting on a couch in Dean's apartment. | The-Military-Guide.com

Our last photo together.

While Dad was in the hospital I knew nothing about his finances, and I didn’t have his computer password or any of his account logins.  (Dad could no longer remember any of his finances, and he hadn’t paid his bills in several months.)  After many hours of research I was able to figure out most of the picture from the four-drawer file cabinet in his small apartment. By the end of 2011 I had a conservator’s appointment and the legal authority to sort things out. It took several more years before I was sure that I’d found everything and had solved all of the mysteries.

During Dad’s first few years in the care facility, one of his perpetual conversations was his worry that he couldn’t remember how to go back to his apartment to pay his rent and his other bills. We always assured him that he’d left us a complete set of records and we knew what to do. We told him that he had plenty of money, and we were able to take care of everything. When he heard this, we could always see the fear and concern drain away as his face relaxed into happiness. We had a lot of practice at it because he’d replay that loop at least hourly.

In retrospect, we realized that Dad had probably been living with depression for decades. Alzheimer’s freed him of that for him to enjoy some of the happiest years of his life. He passed away in November 2017.

You can read more about managing a parent’s finances (and many more related posts) at this link.

 

Doing the annual paperwork

It’s an ironic coincidence that the podcast episode was posted this week. This used to be the peak of my busiest financial time of the year.

From 2011-2018, the months of December through March were crazy stressful. Along with the holiday drama gatherings and celebrations, I was taking care of two sets of family finances. (I had the easier part. My brother was handling Dad’s day-to-day concerns at the care facility, his medical exams and prescriptions, and his deteriorating symptoms.) As a typical member of the sandwich generation I was wrapping up our annual Marge & Doug financial chores, helping our daughter manage the college fund, and gathering Dad’s year-end financial data. I’d easily spend 10 hours of January putting together Dad’s annual report for the probate court on their particular forms: a full checkbook register, a balance sheet, and projected expenses.

All of that was subject to the critique of the probate court before they’d extend my appointment for another year. There was a perpetual implied threat of being “fired” and replaced by a court-appointed professional conservator– for a suitable fee charged to Dad’s assets.

One year our reports were lost on the court’s computer network and we were declared late. I was on travel and only learned about the judge’s summons (mailed by letter) when my brother called for help. (I was managing Dad’s affairs from Hawaii and wherever we traveled, but the Denver probate court required me to voluntarily waive extradition and appear at their behest as a condition of my conservator’s appointment.) When I e-mailed the court the U.S. postal receipt from mailing in my report, the probate clerk miraculously found our “missing” documents and got them (back) on the network.  The judge canceled our summons.

In two other years the court rejected my report’s analysis and asked for a new financial projection… with another 10 hours of filling out their forms to reach a different conclusion.

In between dealing with the annual reports and the probate court, I was also doing two sets of income taxes. (By this time our daughter was handling her own income-tax returns with only an occasional question.) Dad’s deductions usually wiped out all of his taxes, but I still had to carefully adjust his asset allocation without triggering IRMAA’s higher Medicare premiums.

Even when I got the reports and tax returns under control there would be other “surprises”. The long-term care insurer would change a reporting requirement, or Dad’s medical insurer would decide that his prescriptions needed a new round of reviews and approvals before January’s refills ran out. The conversations seemed to repeat themselves every year:  Why yes, yes I did want the bills sent to a Hawaii address and the medications sent to a Denver address. No, the care facility would not do prescription refills via the U.S. mail. You claim you can’t talk to me because of HIPAA patient privacy?!? Did you want me to pay your invoice or would you rather debate my appointment with the probate court? Well then.

 

And each year when the paperwork was finally finished…

Image of seven different probate court reports and petitions reporting the death of a conservator's ward and requesting termination of the conservator's appointment. | The-Military-Guide.com

Paperwork for the probate court.

Maybe my conservator’s appointment would be extended so that we could do this next year. No pressure.

By the time April started, I was usually burned out on all the paperwork and wincing at every official letter in our mailbox.

You know what makes this paperwork even harder? Settling your parent’s estate after they pass away. It was another six months after Dad’s death before I could process the conflicting emotions of grief and relief.

2019 was the first time in eight years that I was able to relax over the holidays without dealing with reports or income-tax returns or other caregiver financial issues swirling around in my head. This year has been much better, although I still feel the sad memories of the stress. I’m pretty sure they’ll fade over the next few years.

 

The next generation(s)

Image of Doug Nordman's granddaughter holding a copy of the book "The Military Guide To Financial Independence and Retirement" | The-Military-Guide.com

She’s getting a head start!

My father only visited his granddaughter three times in over 18 years before Alzheimer’s took his cognition. He was attentive with holiday cards & gifts and the occasional letter, but he never really connected with her as much as I connected with my grandparents. My daughter’s memories of Grandpa Dean have to come from my stories and our family photo archives.

Now that I’m a rookie grandpa, I’m going to help my granddaughter enjoy having her grandparents in her life. As you’re reading this post, we’re getting ready to spend a month of bonding over bottles and diaper changes.

As you might imagine, Marge and I also have some pretty firm opinions on our estate planning.

If the time comes for our disability care, our daughter will have all the powers of attorney and financial tools she’ll need… without gatekeepers and with minimal caregiver stress.

Our family had our own difficult conversations, but now our daughter knows that we’re not going to dump these issues on her new family. It’s given her a tremendous sense of relief and reassurance.

We hope that our experiences will help you have those talks in your family.

 

Your Call To Action

Please listen to the podcast. (You’ll enjoy our rotating conversation!) Use the resources we explain during our Q&A, and figure out how to have the hard conversation with your parents. Do it while you still can. Believe me, it only gets harder if you put it off until later.

Maybe you can jumpstart the conversation by sending this post (and the podcast) to your parents.  Share what you’ve done for your estate planning, and then ask them what you need to know about theirs.

 

 

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Related articles:
The Facebook group for the What’s Up Next? podcast:
Links to all the other related posts about being my father’s financial caregiver

Posted in Insurance, Military Life & Family, Money Management & Personal Finance, Reviews | 2 Comments

Yet Another Decade In Review Post


My spouse and I enjoyed a heck of a year. The end of 2019 marks 20 years of our financial independence and over 17 years of my military retirement. I’ve written about military personal finance for over 15 years and I hope I have a few decades left!

And yeah, I empathize with my fellow math nerds who insist that 2019 isn’t the end of the decade. We might be missing the point, though. Just like we did for Y2K and 2009, I’m here for both parties when we celebrate the end of the teens and then celebrate the end of 2020.

We have a lot to celebrate. Let’s hit the highlights.

The Military Guide

Image of the website "The Military Guide" made up of a blue text box with red wings. | The-Military-Guide.com

The latest logo.

This site turned nine years old last year. The very first question that we answered back in September 2010 was “But… But… But What Will I DO All Day?!?”

It’s the agonized concern of everyone who achieves financial independence and quits working for a paycheck.

Speaking of agony, you can still track down the blog’s very first post with its original theme right here.

I wanted to title it “Hello world” after the computer programmer sentiment, but I eventually went with the even more clever title “The first post.” Remember blogrolls and sidebar archives? That was at least four blog themes ago.

Those posts were followed by several months of excerpts from the book. While the blog was building its audience, the book was published in June 2011.  Other editions include a bargain-price abridged 4”x6” 64-page pocket guide and the eBook.

The top three posts of the site from all of those years have aged well: VA disability compensation and calculating a Reserve pension.

VA Disability Compensation Rates (updated for 2020)
How To Calculate A Reserve Retirement
Using Reserve & Guard Retirement Calculators To Estimate Your Military Pension
As many of us have learned, those are the military’s most complex personal-finance topics with some of the most obscure details. What you don’t learn can really hurt your finances.

The site has earned millions of visitors and pageviews over the years, but the real traffic compliment is that it’s blocked nearly a million malicious login attempts and deleted a half-million spam comments.

I’ve written over a thousand posts during the decade, although our last content audit pruned that back over the years to the top 522. (Well, 523 now.) We’ve attempted to index the heck out of the database with the search box and categories and tags, yet your best navigation tool is still the archives of the post titles.  Scroll down to browse them by year, or search that page for keywords.

When’s the next edition? The next book?

We’re working on it!

“The Military Guide To Financial Independence And Retirement” is evergreen. I deliberately focused on the long-term issues of investments and lifestyle. I knew this was important way back in 2005 when I started the first draft, and I’ll keep writing evergreen books.

Woodcut of The Caxton Celebration - an image of William Caxton showing specimens of his printing to King Edward IV and his Queen. | The-Military-Guide.com

How traditional publishing feels today.

Today’s military pays pensions to retirees under at least four different pension plans. (We still have people in uniform who started their active duty in the 1970s!) The book’s next edition could add a chapter on the Blended Retirement System, and it could remove the debate about the value of the Career Status Bonus of the REDUX retirement system. I’ve already updated that material on the blog.

Meanwhile topics like “The Fog of Work” will always be relevant.

The warehouse at Impact Publications may still hold a pallet or two of hardcopy books from the current print run, and hopefully the future is print on demand. For those of you who’ve purchased the eBook version of The Military Guide, we’ll update your file when we publish new editions.

Our second book is in editing now with ChooseFI Media.  We expect to publish that in spring 2020, after my co-author (my daughter!) and her spouse finish the first part of their own important long-term project. I’ve written more about that at the end of this post.

My third book(!) grew out of attending FI Chautauqua in September 2019.  I’ve put together that outline and some of the blog posts will go into the book chapters. I’ll work on the rest of the book after the second book is launched and running.

The fourth book (yeah, I know) has been sitting on my hard drive for a few years. It’s a guide to making good decisions with military insurance benefits. I’ve let myself get distracted by the second & third books, and I’ll finish the fourth one during the next decade. And this time I really mean it!

The 4% Safe Withdrawal Rate

Let’s deal with the most important question of the decades: is financial independence sustainable? Will our portfolio survive the 4% SWR?

Spoiler alert: Yes.

Image of a bar graph of the Nordman family net worth with 1999 indexed to 100 (the start of our financial independence) and 2019 showing 271% of that ratio. | The-Military-Guide.com

The financial independence growth curve.

Our money will survive the 30-year simulation of the 4% SWR, and we now know that it’ll last the rest of our lives. We have 271% of the net worth we started with 20 years ago, and far more than we need. Despite spending our assets through two recessions, the vast majority of that wealth has come from investment growth.

By the way, that wealth has not come from book royalties or the blog. I donate all of my writing revenue to military-friendly charities. That’s not “a portion of the profits”– it’s all of the checks and deposits.

Here’s more context for that 271%:

Another implication of 271% is that our withdrawal rate has dropped well below the 4% SWR. This means that our investments will survive for longer than 60 years.  If our investments keep growing in the next decade then it’s quite possible that we’ll stop withdrawing principal and live off the dividends.

A statistician would note that this success is typical because it was very likely to happen in the first place. In 1999 the survival probability of our portfolio was over 90%, and years ago William Bernstein showed that any probability over 80% was good enough.

Imagine if casinos ran blackjack tables with an 80% probability that you’d win more than you’d lose… and even threw in free food & lodging. That’s what your life can become when your net worth is at least 25x your annual spending.

My military pension is another reason that we’ve felt comfortable with the 4% SWR for the rest of our spending. We’ve annuitized a portion of our investments, and that effectively drives the failure rate of the 4% SWR to zero. We’re even self-insured for long-term care.  Today it’s clear that our assets will last longer than either of us.

Any annuity is better longevity insurance than the attitude of working “Just One More Year” to minimize the risk of portfolio failure. The 4% SWR simulations don’t even include Social Security, and for many people, it’s all the longevity insurance that the vast majority of portfolios will ever need.

Enough money talk. Are we bored and unfulfilled yet?

Boredom happens when you’re trapped in something that you’re not interested in doing. My spouse and I have completely redesigned our lifestyles around “not boring”.

We’re responsible for our own entertainment, and after 17 years of practice we’re pretty good at it. We’re perpetually curious and we’re constantly exploring new ideas & activities. We’re optimizing every aspect of our lifestyles. We’ve stayed open to changing our priorities as we age and go through other life transitions.

Those are the types of decades that I love reviewing.

Image of Doug Nordman sipping coffee at a cafe among the Roman ruins in Conimbriga Portugal. | The-Military-Guide.com

Slow travel, still not bored.

I retired from active duty at the age of 41 while we were raising a nine-year-old. We worked on our home and our rental property. I made a lot of new friends, both online and in person. We spent time with relatives and explored the islands. We optimized our finances. I even started learning about angel investing. All of that kept life exciting for the rest of my 40s. In my spare time I got better at surfing and I wrote a book.

We published the book a few months after I turned 50 years old. We also coached our young adult through college and helped my father cope with Alzheimer’s.  We survived our second recession of retirement. I attended my first FinCon, my first Camp Mustache, and my first CampFI.  We did a major renovation of our home’s family room and of our entire rental property. I made many more new friends. We spent time with family and traveled the world. In between financial meetups, I learned more about active investing, and I spent time optimizing rest of our finances to do even less of it. We vicariously enjoyed watching our daughter launch into life, career, and marriage. My life also managed to smack me upside the head with a reminder that I was no longer invulnerable, let alone immortal.  In my spare time, I got better at surfing and we wrote another book.

This year we’ll spend lots of time with family and hanging out with friends. We’re planning to travel the world some more. There’ll be at least one financial meetup, and we’re trying to schedule a couple more. We’re wrapping up our estate planning and simplifying our finances even more. My daughter and I are editing our book, and we’ll publish it a few months before I turn 60 years old. In the meantime I’m doing all the surfing I can handle, I’d like to get better at stand-up paddleboarding, and I’m intrigued by hydrofoil boards. We even came up with another book idea.

I’ll reach 18 years of retirement in June. I’m really glad I didn’t spend those years in the workplace.

Image of Doug Nordman surfing at White Plains Beach on Oahu. | The-Military-Guide.com

Home break, still not bored.

I’m not precisely sure how we’ll spend the next decade but I bet it involves: Travel. Meetups. Family. Friends. Home improvement. Surfing. Publishing a book (or two).

Financially, we’ll focus more on philanthropy. I’ll write more about that in another post.

At the end of the 2020s decade I’ll turn 70 years old. I don’t understand how the heck that happened, but I know that I’m not bored or unfulfilled.

Will society’s financial independence trend continue?

As I was drafting this post (among everything else in our daily routine), a Bloomberg executive editor tweeted a thoughtful question:

Image of a tweet from Bloomberg Executive Editor Tracy Alloway asking: “One thing I’ve often wondered- does the financial independence/retire early movement (#FIREmovement) survive the eventual end of the current bull market? The idea of pouring all your money into $VTSAX and living off it for the rest of your life feels like such a bull market thing.” | The-Military-Guide.com

“One thing I’ve often wondered- does the financial independence/retire early movement (#FIREmovement) survive the eventual end of the current bull market? The idea of pouring all your money into $VTSAX and living off it for the rest of your life feels like such a bull market thing.”

Of course I immediately replied that certainly our finances will survive for the rest of our lives.  Yet in retrospect I realized that I’d missed her point: Will the FI movement survive the next recession?

Will people still find careers they love, yet save for the life security of financial independence?

Will people still push for FI so that they can choose the work they love?

Image of the American DOW Jones stock index from 1900-2016 with annotations of "The History of This Is The Top" | The-Military-Guide.com

No seriously, this really must be the top.

Will they still save and invest for enough financial security to ditch an unfulfilling career that they no longer enjoy and find a new career path to FI?

Or will everyone end up hoarding gold, rice, water, and ammunition while hoping that this month the stock market can’t possibly go any lower?

Your call to action

I can’t predict the dates of the next bear market or economic recession, but they will happen. When world events smack us upside the head again, what do you want the next decade of your life to look like?

Do you want to find a challenging and fulfilling career while you’re investing for financial independence? Will you break free of the fog of work to spend more time with family & friends? Will you take responsibility for your own entertainment and plan for your FI life? Will you have the financial flexibility to consider all of these options no matter what the short-term stock market does?

How will you handle your next decade?

Please post your goals in the comments, or ask me more questions about your planning.

See you next year… when we’ll celebrate a new decade with all of us math nerds too!

Postscript

Why am I posting this decadal review in late January?Image of a cartoon silhouette of a surfboard with a baby on top and the caption "Baby On Board" | The-Military-Guide.com

Well, my spouse and I have been waiting for one more project to wrap up.

Last week our daughter and son-in-law delivered a healthy baby girl. Marge and I are enjoying our new names: GrandDoug and GrandMarge.

[earnist ref=”the-military-guide-to-financial-independence” id=”70177″]

Related articles:
Here are the top FI posts of 2019 and the best posts of each year from 2010-2018:

Best posts of 2019:
Should You Attend FinCon, Military Influencer Conference, Camp Mustache, CampFI, and FI Chautauqua?
Family Estate Planning For Your Disability
Military Space Available Travel: Tips for Flying Space-A The Navy Way
“I Inherited Money And Now I Can’t Blog About Financial Independence Anymore”
The 1980s-2000s: How I Wish I’d Invested Back Then
Will Your Retirement Plan Handle Long-Term Care Needs? How Your Genome Impacts Disability, Caregiving, And Estate Planning
Our Retirement – The Spending Smile Of Financial Independence
Good News! How Our Nords Family Financial Independence Life Will Change In 2019
2018: Don’t Gut It Out To 20: Leave Active Duty For The Reserves Or National Guard
2017: “Hey, Nords: How’s Your Net Worth?!?”
2016: Why You File Your Veterans Disability Claim (Not Just How) (a four-post series)
2015: Getting Older In Early Retirement
2014: Why I Won’t Buy Long-Term Care Insurance
2013: Save Just One Percent More
2012: How much cash in a retirement portfolio?
2011: Five reasons to NOT retire early
2010: Frugal Living is Not Deprivation – How Living on Less Can Result in a Richer Life

Posted in Financial Independence, Money Management & Personal Finance, Travel | 6 Comments

Raising Your Money-Savvy Family For Next Generation Financial Independence


It’s coming in spring on 8 September 2020: the book you’ve asked for about teaching your kids how to manage their money.

Image of Carol Pittner and Doug Nordman (her father) at Carol's graduation from Rice University in 2014. Carol and Doug have written "Raising Your Money-Savvy Family For Next-Generation Financial Independence." | The-Military-Guide.com

Life-long collaboration.

My daughter Carol and I recently signed a book contract with ChooseFI Media to publish “Raising Your Money-Savvy Family For Next Generation Financial Independence.”

It’s written from your questions asked at financial conferences, at meetups, and over many cups of coffee. Carol and I use a back & forth narrative describing our family’s financial parenting tactics versus her memories of how they really turned out.

We cover everything from allowances, chores, and jobs, to financial incentives, Roth IRAs, and college funds. We even describe a surprisingly effective way to help your teen save up for their first car.

You’ll learn how children think about managing their money. (Pro tip: they don’t share your goals.) You’ll learn how to avoid our mistakes, and how to recover from yours. We invented a technique or two that you might have never heard of.

Best of all, your kids will learn to manage their money by making their mistakes at home with you— instead of at college or in their first job. They’ll learn from their experiences, not just from your advice.

Frankly, you should find a copy of this book just to read the foreword. You won’t believe who wrote it– I can hardly believe it myself. Every time I write about this I get a goofy smile on my face just remembering how Carol and I made a very big request, and it all came together.

Let me share more about the writing & publishing process.

How did you get the idea?

I didn’t plan to write this book. In 2018 I was working on a completely different book, and I was also spending an occasional weekend at Camp Mustache or CampFI.

One afternoon I gave a talk about the mistakes we’d made with our investments while we pursued financial independence.  A parent asked: “How did you teach FI to your daughter so that she can avoid your mistakes?”

Image of Doug Nordman giving a presentation at CampFI Southeast in Hawthorne FL in January 2018. | The-Military-Guide.com

CampFI: presenting right after breakfast.

I wasn’t expecting that question! By 2018 Carol had been out of college for several years and was well into her own Navy career. We parents are tremendously proud to watch her and her spouse make their way in the world, but we’d never thought that a bunch of other parents would want to hear about how we helped her launch from the nest.

As the parent sat there with an expectant look on their face, I babbled something about Marge and I giving Carol a lot of opportunities to manage her allowance and make mistakes before she left home.

A few months later I met that parent again and asked them if my answer had helped.

They said “Well, I tried giving them both an allowance, but they just kept wasting it. I gave up.”

Whoops. I was zero negative help. We talked a little more, and someday that parent may try again, but they clearly felt that my advice wasn’t working. (Yet.) Even worse, they’d lost confidence in exactly the same tactic that Marge and I had used with Carol.

Then Marge and I went to a CampFI in Little Rock. I highly recommend that location and the outstanding local attendees. At the camp, I gave my same talk about how we wish we’d invested in the 1980s and 1990s.  The very first question was from a parent, and I already knew that they were raising a family big enough to form its own basketball team.

“How did you raise your daughter so that she can pursue financial independence?”

Oboy. No pressure.

I talked about all the classic mistakes that kids will make with money, and how parents can help them talk through their feelings. I made the point that wasting money as a kid is a lot cheaper than making the same mistakes in high school or at their first adult job, but some money would definitely be wasted.

Let’s face it: I was babbling at a slightly higher level, but I wasn’t much more help than before. That parent had a lot more practical experience than I do, and I don’t think they went home with new ideas to teach their kids how to manage their money.

After the talk, Marge looked at me and uttered those fateful words: “Nords, you need to stop whatever book you’re writing now and work on that money-savvy kid book.”

How did you and Carol start writing together?

When Marge and I visited Carol and her spouse in Norfolk, we told her about the CampFI talk and asked her the same question. “What did we do that really helped you learn to manage your money?”

Wow. She lit up! She had a dozen memories of what she liked, what had worked, and what didn’t. K.J. had noticed a few things about her money behavior in their marriage, and now he had the origin stories. Our dinner-table conversation took off and lasted for nearly an hour.

Image of Carol Pittner and Doug Nordman (her father) surfing at Dam Neck Beach in Virginia Beach VA in 2018. | The-Military-Guide.com

Writing a book together is hard work!

As we talked, I took notes. Later those bullet points went into an outline, and I asked Carol if she wanted to add her stories in her voice.

By the end of the week, we had most of a chapter. I realized that Carol was writing more than just her stories– she was a co-author. By the end of the following week, her insights made it clear that she’s the lead author and I’m strapped in for the ride.

Carol was a challenging kid to raise, but we write very well together. I might have more experience (I’ve had a three-decade head start) but she has a very strong voice. She’s a much better writer in her 20s than I was, and I’ve tremendously enjoyed our collaboration.

What’s different about publishing your second book?

The good news is that this time we had over eight years of blog posts before we started writing the book.  Some of the blog’s stories and tactics went right into the book.

In 2005 (when Carol was a teen), I drafted The Military Guide over a leisurely four years. Sometimes I’d write a chapter in a few days, while other times I’d put the manuscript away for a few months. We’d occasionally talk about the book but it was just one of my projects tucked away among family time, surfing, and chores. Carol had a fantastic high-school English teacher, and his advice came home with her when she offered a few suggestions on the draft. That’s why The Military Guide has chapter checklists.

On this second book, Carol and I were averaging a chapter every two weeks. It was clear that this draft was going to dash to the finish line in about six months. (And it did!) Carol and I weren’t competitive about our collaboration (Marge is already rolling her eyes as she reads this) but we each had things to say and we were enjoying the conversation. This time Marge was editing the drafts of two authors, but let’s just say that Carol needed a lot less editing than her co-author.

In 2009 when I searched for a publisher of my first book, I spent nine months writing query letters in series instead of sending them out in a single blast. The good news was that I wrote a better query letter with every new attempt. The other news was that those letters were a lot of work. I knew that I could always self-publish, and I kept working on the next query letter. When Impact Publishing bought the manuscript the owner said: “I bought your manuscript because your query letter has a great marketing plan!”

In 2018 we already knew the personal-finance publishers. We didn’t even write a query letter. This time it really helped to be a published author– and that can really go to your head.

Image of Doug Nordman and seven other FinCon18 attendees sitting in a pink flamingo pool float at the Rosen Shingle Creek Resort in Orlando FL. | The-Military-Guide.com

Creatives working hard all day long at FinCon18 in Orlando.

It started at FinCon18 in Orlando. I was catching up with friends, and one of them is an executive at a very successful company with an indie publishing branch.

Exec: “What have you been up to, Nords?”
Me (smiling and sipping coffee): “It’s a funny story. My daughter and I are writing a book.”
Exec: “Really? We’d like to publish it!”
Me (nearly blowing coffee out my nose): “Um, wait, what? Would you like to know what the book is about?”
Exec: “Personal finance, right?”
Me: “Well, yeah, and this time–”
Exec: “That’s why we’d like to publish your book. Let me know when you’re ready.”

Image of Doug Nordmanand four other people on stand-up paddleboards at CampFI Mid-Atlantic in May 2019 on Virginia's James River. | The-Military-Guide.com

A typical CampFI reader focus group.

In May 2019, Marge and I attended CampFI Mid-Atlantic.  (I highly recommend this conference too, because stand-up paddleboarding on the James River! Oh, and it’s also a great weekend with a fun crowd of people pursuing FI.) This time my talk was about raising a money-savvy family, and I mentioned that Carol and I were writing the book.

Brad Barrett and Jonathan Mendonsa were in the crowd.  I knew all about their ChooseFI podcast, of course, but I didn’t realize they were growing the company in all media directions.

Jonathan tracked me down after my seminar.

Jonathan: “Nords, we’d like to publish your book!”
Me: “You guys are publishing books?!”
Jonathan: “We are now!”

Carol and I had a lot to talk about.

In September I spent most of FinCon19 (Washington DC!) networking in real life with my fellow money nerds, as usual. I also spent hours with those two publishers talking through all of the book questions. Every day Carol and I chatted back & forth across the time zones to figure out our priorities. Deciding between these publishers is like trying to choose among Olympic athletes.

Ironically for a group of personal-finance experts, we did not talk about the money. Nobody was competing on royalty rates or marketing services or even the size of the stretch limo for the book tour. Instead, we were comparing our audiences and trying to decide how to reach them.

We all agreed that ChooseFI has the family audience who is most likely to buy the book by the container-load. (And the eBook. And the audiobook.) Military families will enjoy it, of course (because our daughter grew up in one), but our ideas and stories appeal to all families.

Better yet, ChooseFI Media has MK Williams. She’s just self-published her fourth novel, and her third book is a thrilling suspense novel about… of all things… financial independence.  (No, seriously, read the book.  When you’re pursuing FI, the allegory is hilarious.)  Best of all, she’s published the FIology Workbook with David Baughier.  David and his family visited us last summer, and we chatted for hours about what it’s like to work with MK.

It’s all good. And I’m not just saying that because MK has a gigantic marketing spreadsheet of all the tasks which Carol and I (among several others) need to wrap up before this book gets printed.

I highly recommend MK and ChooseFI Media. If you have a manuscript to submit to her… then please wait until after our Money-Savvy Family book is out. (Just kidding. Maybe.) Carol and I are well on our way and MK’s building a publishing powerhouse.

What’s next?

Image of the Google Doc editing window for the book by Carol Pittner and Doug Nordman "Raising Your Money-Savvy Family For Next Generation Financial Independence". | The-Military-Guide.com

Screenshot of the editing in progress… all right, back to work.

We’re wrapping up our second round of editing and heading into the line edits. (We’re still anticipating the copyediting, yay!) If everything goes well then the print and eBook editions will be in press by spring 2020.

The audiobook comes after that. Please let me know if you have James Earl Jones’ contact info, because otherwise, you’re going to have to put up with my voice in between Carol’s sections. I’m sure the audio engineers are looking forward to stitching together those voice files.

In a few weeks, we’ll be ready for your feedback on the cover designs. Speaking as a nuclear-trained submariner, you do not want me making those decisions. Carol and MK might be looking forward to your help even more than I am.

We’d especially like to thank the beta readers of the CampFI Alumni Facebook group. Your feedback and polling votes helped guide the book through the usual rocks & shoals of editing. It’s one thing to exclaim to a publisher: “But you’ve never seen a book like this before, and we’re special snowflakes!” It’s quite different to respond: “Here’s what the reader poll data and other feedback is telling us. And by the way, these people are already trying to pre-order the book.”

Finally, in January 2020 Carol and K.J. are launching one of the world’s most innovative book-marketing tactics. Follow this blog’s social media channels– and prepare to be amazed!

[earnist ref=”the-military-guide-to-financial-independence” id=”70177″]

Related articles:
Start a Roth IRA For Your Kid
Early retirement and the kid’s college fund
Raising a money-smart kid
Raising an ER-smart kid
Retiring Early — with Kids?
Family Estate Planning For Your Disability
“I Inherited Money And Now I Can’t Blog About Financial Independence Anymore”
Enemies of Peace (by MK Williams)
The FIology Workbook (by David Baughier and MK Williams)

Posted in Financial Independence, Military Life & Family, Money Management & Personal Finance, Reviews | 2 Comments

Should You Attend FinCon, Military Influencer Conference, Camp Mustache, CampFI, and FI Chautauqua?


Your journey to financial independence can be a little lonely if you’re doing it all by yourself. Even social media, podcasts, and videos are poor substitutes for hanging out with people who share your goals.

This post will cover different ways to get a little boost of FI endorphins to last for months… or at least until the next boost. Better yet, you’ll build a network of new friends who can help you stay motivated– and accountable.

It’s even more fun to do these conferences and meetups after you’ve reached FI. In 2019 my spouse and I put together a monster travel year around them, with four of them in the last six months. We were off-island for a total of four months over two trips.

If you’ve wondered what you’ll do all day in financial independence then sit down, strap in, and follow along with us.

Which conference is the best?

Image of a pass for FinCon in 2020 for the 10th year of the conference. | The-Military-Guide.com

I’ve already bought my FinCon20 pass.

This is like asking which of your kids you love the most, so we’ll avoid this perpetual debate and review them chronologically.

The big conferences make it easier to meet more people (and more sponsors, if that’s your goal) while the small conferences make it easier to hang out with friends and have deeper conversations about FI.

How big are they?

Here are the numbers.

FinCon19 was over 2500 people. The four-day conference has grown more than an order of magnitude since the first one in 2011 (225 people), and I’ve attended every one since 2012. FinCon20 might approach 3000 people. This time it’s held 30 September – 3 October at the Long Beach conference center with room blocks at six adjacent hotels.

Military Influencer Conference started in 2017 with “only” 250 people. In 2019, MIC sold nearly 1000 tickets. MIC20 will be inMilitary City USA” San Antonio on 23-26 September. That could help it grow to 1500 military servicemembers, spouses, and veterans who are entrepreneurs, non-profit executives, and other creators.

Camp Mustache and CampFI are typically 50-70 people over a weekend. They’re held in rural locations like retreat centers and church camps, and they have great opportunities for in-depth conversations with new friends. The popular spots sell out within a few weeks after ticket sales begin, but you can also add your name to a waitlist.

FI Chautauqua is even smaller at about 30 attendees. It’s billed as “interesting conversations with interesting people in interesting places”. It has a one-week itinerary in various locations on other continents. It seems to sell out in just a few days, and sometimes in only a few hours. Again, sign up on the waitlist and stay flexible.

During 2019 I attended my fourth CampFI, my eighth FinCon, my third MIC, and our first FI Chautauqua. I didn’t make it to a Camp Mustache.

CampFI

Image of the CampFI logo for a weekend financial independence conference. | The-Military-Guide.com

Choose the location nearest you?

These weekends are for everyone from all walks of life, whether you’re just learning about personal finance or you’re already financially independent. They’re family-friendly, although there’s no childcare.

CampFIs are held around the U.S. mainland in a half-dozen locations. (I’ve attended four of them over the last two years.) Church camps and retreat centers offer inexpensive lodging with meal service for roughly 50 people from a Friday evening to Monday lunch. All of the camps offer some hotel-style rooms, cabins with bunkrooms, RV hookups, or a few spots to pitch your tent.

Friday evenings are spent meeting everyone and group socializing. You’re probably already following the speakers from their blogs, podcasts, and videos. You might have met the other attendees virtually in a Facebook group for the event. If you’re at a local CampFI then you may already know some of the attendees from social media, or other personal-finance meetups, or just from carpooling to the site.

The weekend’s presentations are a couple of hours each morning with another session or two each afternoon. There’s plenty of free time to enjoy the camp facilities. Early mornings may include nature walks and workouts. After dinner you’ll stay up way past your bedtime talking around the fire circle, playing a new board game, or embarrassing yourself with a karaoke group.

You’ll enjoy the facilities and the entertainment, but you’ll also have plenty of opportunities to discuss in-depth questions about personal finance, financial independence, and lifestyle. Maybe you’re trying to pay off your student loans more quickly, or growing a portfolio of investment rental properties, or choosing a better asset allocation. Most of the camp weekends include a chance to record a podcast episode as part of a panel or by asking questions from the audience.

My spouse and I typically anchor our globetrotting itineraries with family and financial events, and then we fill in the remaining weeks with slow travel. In early April we caught a military Space A flight from Oahu to Norfolk for the third wedding anniversary of our daughter and son-in-law. We capped off that trip at CampFI Mid-Atlantic over Memorial Day weekend.

If you’re military then we can sit down for a full financial & career discussion. Over that Memorial Day, my spouse and I had several discussions about retirement with another military couple. First, they reassured themselves that their financial plan would work, but then we talked about lifestyle and what they could do all day. They already had a great plan, and they were able to check all of their details against our knowledge & experience.

At an earlier CampFI we did an entire financial review with another military camper over several talks: comparing the Blended Retirement System to the legacy High Three pension, analyzing the cash flow on one of their rental properties, discussing the transition process and their VA disability claim, and reviewing all of the next steps for affiliating with a Reserve unit. They literally changed their life that weekend because they put together the right environment with plenty of time to discuss all of the right questions with each of the right people.

Image of five stand-up paddleboarders on the James River at CampFI Mid-Atlantic in May 2019. | The-Military-Guide.com

I’m in the middle.

It’s not just nerding out about personal finance. At CampFI Mid-Atlantic we spent Sunday afternoon on the James River. The surf sucked (flat to two inches from passing boats) but I enjoyed coaching a half-dozen new standup paddleboard surfers. I also finally met Justin McCurry of RootOfGood in person after knowing him online for over a decade.

By the way, CampFI is a non-profit affair. There are no corporate sponsors, although you might spend the weekend with people from ChooseFI. The organizers are not enriching themselves from the ticket sales, and they’re doing the work for free. They’re at CampFI for the same reasons as the rest of us: sharing our journey to financial independence and boosting each other along the way.

Camp Mustache

Image of the schedule of activities for Camp Mustache 2017 in North Bend WA. | The-Military-Guide.com

The agenda for Camp Mustache 2017.

The three volunteers who put together Camp Mustache have created the model for CampFI. The big difference is that the original Camp Mustache is the same Memorial Day weekend every year in the same location outside of Seattle.  (You may also find other versions on the east coast or in Canada.)

Another gigantic difference at Camp Mustache is the butt-kicking four-mile hike up the 4000 feet of Mount Si. (It’s another four miles back down to the lodge.) It’s not just an incredible view of the countryside but also a rite of passage in determination and persistence.

I enjoy Camp Mustaches at least as much as CampFIs. Speaking as a Hawaii guy, though, it’s still kinda chilly up there in late May. It’s also very popular among Mustachians, and I feel as if I’m hogging a ticket if I go there every year.

I didn’t go to Camp Mustache in 2019. My spouse and I were already on the east coast for Memorial Day, so we planned the weekend around CampFI Mid-Atlantic.

FinCon

Image of the FinCon19 logo and slogan "Where Money And Media Meet". | The-Military-Guide.com

The day before the crowds arrived…

Officially, FinCon is where money and media meet. We’re all discussing personal finance while leveling up our skills at blogging, podcasting, video, writing books, building audiences, and growing revenue.

After eight FinCons I’ve met a lot of people and made many friends. It’s unofficially billed as the nation’s largest gathering of money nerds, where it’s our chance to discuss everything in person instead of online.

And when I write “discuss”, I mean “talk ourselves hoarse”.

The FinCon exhibition hall is one of my favorite parts of the conference. Dozens of sponsors have gathered there to inform and educate. (Many of them want to pay you an affiliate fee or a commission, too.) I learn a tremendous amount about the financial industry, from corporate fintech all the way down to the startup entrepreneurs with their great ideas and innovations.

The FinCon presentations have expanded to over a hundred different sessions in the areas mentioned above as well as niches like publishing, advisors, journalism, freelancing, and coaching. It’s impossible to choose among all of the simultaneous events and still have energy left over for the lunches & evening socials. (Let alone the early-morning group workouts or the 2 AM Pizza Club.) Best of all, though, everything is professionally recorded. Your FinCon ticket can include a virtual pass to the video archive, and after FinCon you can view everything multiple times from anywhere at your own pace.

We’re also busy recording our own content. FinCon19 included at least two podcast stations and two video booths staffed by other FinCon volunteers. All we had to do was gear up, sit down, and start talking. In three days at FinCon, I personally recorded two videos and four podcast sessions. (One of my podcast sessions was filling in for an absent guest… with 90 seconds to get ready. I had a great time.) I got to record with rockstar podcasters and other panelists who I’d never spoken with before. If I’d done this during any other time of the year it would’ve taken weeks to arrange.

As a result, a surprising number of us FinCon attendees never actually attend a presentation. We’re too busy talking to people at the booths, or sitting in the hallways or the lounges, doing peer tutoring, or just catching up on life. We’ll catch the presentations later with our virtual passes.

I’m apparently FinCon’s only middle-aged balding ponytailed surfer from Hawaii, so I’ve also helped a lot of people plan their next trip to the islands. A few visitors at a time, we end up having FinCon Hawaii meetups just about every month during the year.

The best part of FinCon19 was finding a publisher for the book that my daughter wrote with me. Our project started from a question during a CampFI (Little Rock in 2018), and we tested it on the crowd during CampFI Mid-Atlantic in 2019. I’ll write more about that in another post.

FinCon20 will be held in Long Beach, and a few of us surfers are trying to put together an afternoon surf session for 20-30 people on the days before & after FinCon. Please contact me if you know a great surf school near Seal Beach.

While we were still buzzing with the endorphins from FinCon19 and a USAA meetup, we rolled right into…

Military Influencer Conference

Image of the Military Influencer Conference 2019 archway set up in front of the exhibit hall. | The-Military-Guide.com

Also the calm before the storm… on the final day of FinCon.

I’d like to think that I helped with the genesis of MIC, although that happened because I was too late for the old MilBlogging conference. The last one was in 2012 and MilBlogging13 was canceled with only a few months’ notice.

You can read more about Curtez Riggs rebooting MilBlogging into MIC. When he called me with questions in 2016, I suggested (along with others) that he contact Philip Taylor about pairing up with FinCon. Curtez was already a USAA influencer, and they came into MIC as a headline sponsor. MIC17 got off to a roaring start in Dallas right before FinCon.

In 2019, MIC hosted over 900 people during the three days after FinCon. That’s nearly 300% growth in only three years. It’s startup-worthy progress for a conference that encourages entrepreneurialism and public service among servicemembers, military spouses, and veterans.

I enjoyed my third MIC, but again I only went to one keynote presentation. I spent the rest of the conference with the sponsors & exhibitors in the exhibition hall, at the roundtable discussions, and in the lounges. It was another three days of discussions with servicemembers and spouses about their military careers and their transitions, and how to reach financial independence along the way.

During the conference, Curtez announced that MIC is splitting off from the FinCon schedule. (A new conference will probably join the FinCon contract and grow like MIC.) In 2020 MIC heads to San Antonio on 23-26 September. USAA’s headquarters campus is there, and Curtez lives in the area. He’s developed many local contacts over the years and can bring much more value to MIC with lower prices for food & lodging.

Image of a military C-5 cargo jet on the runway at Dover Air Force Base, getting ready to fly to Spangdahlem Air Base in Germany. | The-Military-Guide.com

On the bus, waiting to board the C-5.

On the last day of MIC, my spouse and I drove a rental car to Dover Air Force Base in Delaware and caught a military C-5 Space A flight to Spangdahlem Air Base in Germany. We worked our way through Trier and Luxembourg to Lisbon. After a leisurely recovery week in Lisbon’s Alfama and Baixa quarters, we took a train up the coast to Porto for our first FI Chautauqua.

FI Chautauqua

I’ve looked forward to this conference for over five years, but we could never line up the dates… or get tickets.Logo of FI Chautauqua: an image of an upside-down globe with the word "Chautauqua" next to it. | The-Military-Guide.com

JL Collins visited the site of his first Chautauqua in 2012 and started the conference in 2013. It grew in popularity among FI bloggers, and in 2017 Chautauqua expanded to Europe.

Image of a queen-size bed in a hotel room covered with fake dollar bills. | The-Military-Guide.com

An actual room at the Zero Box Lodge.

We spent the first night of Chautauqua in Porto at the Zero Box Lodge. It’s one of the best executions of “frugal urban hotel” that I’ve ever seen. It’s built into a high-rise which used to house a bank, and they preserved the original vault space. The “rooms” remind me of submarine berthing, but in a good way.  (There’s a reason it’s called a box lodge.)  It’s worth touring the hotel just to experience its combination of hyper-efficient design, hipster common spaces, and sardonic financial commentary.

Our first night also included the usual socializing and group dinner. I already knew our hosts and presenters, and I’d met a couple of the other attendees at a CampFI. Almost all of us had joined our Facebook group a few months earlier, so we already knew a little about each other before our first meeting in person.

The next afternoon we headed to the main location of Chautauqua: the Douro41 resort in the valley a couple hours up the Douro River. That resort is laid out to offer a quiet, luxurious, unplugged concierge experience. I’m pretty sure the other guests were not very happy to have 30 FI nerds running around at all hours of the day (and night) discussing their finances and lifestyles.

The presentations were outstanding:

Image of the Douro41 Resort on the Douro River in the Douro Valley of Portugal, the site of FI Chautauqua Portugal. | The-Military-Guide.com

The river view of the Douro41 Resort.

Those events took up 2-3 hours per day. We spent the rest of our time in small roundtable seminars, or having 1-to-1 “Ask Me Anything” conversations with our presenters. Of course, there was plenty of unstructured time for us to enjoy the resort, talk story, and sample all of their farm-to-table (and ocean-to-table) cuisine. The Douro River did not have surf, and the resort didn’t even have stand-up paddleboards, but there were kayaks. My spouse and I had a great paddle on the river and a good time exploring the resort’s hillsides.

Along with interesting people and interesting conversations, Chautauqua delivered on “interesting places”. One morning we toured a Porto port cellar (with free samples) and another afternoon was spent in the small yet ancient town of Guimaraes. We dined at several very nice restaurants as well as the resort’s dinner pool party.

A personal theme of FI Chautauqua was a flurry of e-mails with my daughter. We had been ready to self-publish our book, but when we read over the publisher’s royalty contract we realized that we could do much better with their existing audience and their marketing experience. By the fifth night of the Chautauqua week, all of our publisher questions had been answered and we were ready to sign.

Fortunately, my daughter and I had already finished the manuscript, so “all that’s left” is editing. I knew that wouldn’t start for another week, which meant I was entitled to kick back and bask in a warm glow of accomplishment. I’d spent over six years writing my first book, but the one with my daughter took us only a year!

That warm glow lasted about 12 hours. The next morning, as we gathered for our group presentation and discussion, my spouse looked around the room and suddenly asked me “Does anyone here have more FI experience than you & me?

About a third of the group was already FI. There were a few people older than us, and there were lots of people who we predict will accumulate a higher net worth than us. But our 17 years of FI turned out to be nearly a decade ahead of the runner-up. My spouse uttered those fateful words again: “Nords, there’s another book in you about staying FI for life.

Then she started loading me up with bullet points from everything she’d learned that week. She’s very good at making the decisions and then delegating the assignments. Now that I think back on 2018, it’s how my daughter and I ended up writing our second book too.

Image of Alan Donegan giving a presentation at FI Chautauqua Portugal, using an image from the movie "Back To The Future". | The-Military-Guide.com

Alan Donegan is really good at this!

That afternoon, Alan Donegan guided us through an exercise in creative thinking (while suspending criticism). We sat down with five other Chautauquans and spent a few minutes helping each of us come up with ideas for our big life questions. Mine was:

“What advice should I give people to thrive during 50 years of FI?”

In the next few minutes, I got 31 post-its with free-form written answers.

We authors call that a “chapter outline”. Now I’ll be working on the third book when I’m not working on marketing for the second book… or making the edits for the second book.

I’m pretty sure my spouse is smiling as she reads this! One day I will too… after I finally finish the copy edits.

Chautauqua turned out to be even more exhausting than FinCon. By the fifth day, I was catching afternoon cat naps, collapsing in bed early, and sleeping hard on those luxurious resort mattresses. As the bus took us back to Porto and the Zero Box Lodge, I was secretly relieved to catch a break from the intense mental & emotional pace. I thoroughly enjoyed hanging out at the ZBL’s cafe with the next group of Chautauquans arriving for their week, but I was also very happy to spend the next five nights in Porto recovering in our AirBnB.

Was Chautauqua worth the time, effort, and expense? Absolutely.

Would we do it again? I’d love to, but I’m not sure that my older body has the stamina. (And no, I don’t know how JL Collins does it!)  The shorter conferences are much easier to handle on my limited energy budget. Anyway, with only 30 people at each week, I’d feel as if I was hogging another ticket.

I’m glad I made the Chautauqua effort, yet a four-day FinCon or a three-night CampFI is much more my speed.

Your Call To Action: What conference would you like to try?

CampFI: at every stage of your FI journey, but especially if you’re just starting it!

FinCon: personal finance, blogging, podcasting, video, freelancing, and building your business.

MIC San Antonio: military servicemembers, families, and veterans who are building their businesses and non-profits.

FI Chautauqua: approaching FI, travel-hacking to resort destinations, and diving deep on the transition to your next life.

For my spouse and me, 2019 has been one of the busiest retirement “slow” travel years of our lives. In 2020, our Ohana Nords plans include FinCon20 at Long Beach (possibly with group surfing lessons) in September, and hopefully CampFI Southwest at Joshua Tree in October.

Otherwise, our only other confirmed plan for 2020 is to get better acquainted with our first grandchild. And to regain our diaper-changing proficiency.

As I said, 2019 has been one of the busiest years of our family’s lives!

[earnist ref=”the-military-guide-to-financial-independence” id=”70177″]

Related articles:
My public Facebook album “Europe 2019 #2” with more photos (and captions) of our conferences.
FinCon – The Financial Media Conference – How a Small Investment Can Return Dividends
Military Influencer Conference 2018 – A Gathering of Like-Minded Veteran Entrepreneurs
Military Space Available Travel: Tips for Flying Space-A The Navy Way
CampFI And Camp Mustache Are Worth Your Time (And Money)

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